Motivation: the reason or reasons one has for acting or behaving in a particular way.
Synonyms: motive, motivating force, incentive, stimulus, stimulation, inspiration, inducement, incitement, spur, reason.
A couple of weeks ago, I was having a conversation with my guy (That’s right, I got me a man), and he was telling me that people around him were commenting on how snazzy he looked. When I asked what brought on this change, he said that he was inspired by me. This got me thinking about motivation and inspiration.
Fashion designers talk about how their collections were inspired by some exotic location or period of time; Parents are inspired to make the world a better place for their children; Children do things in life to make their parents proud; People go on diets motivated to lose weight and promote better health; Politicians run for office (sometimes) because they see a need for change in the world; Educators are inspired everyday when they see their kids getting whatever it is they are teaching. Most artists or visionaries, regardless of their artistic medium, find inspiration or motivation for what they do, whether it’s to inspire/motivate others or just to become famous. Even Madonna herself has said that she doesn’t perform because she thinks she is the greatest singer or dancer, but she just wanted to push people’s buttons.
How many times have you been or heard somebody get asked “who or what inspired you to …” or “what was the motivation behind…?” Motivation can come in many forms: a fear of death, wanting to provoke thought or even another person or group, inspire others to make change in some way, money or power or that high that success can give you, to prove the naysayers wrong, to push yourself to be better, or even to make someone else proud. We also can find Inspiration in someone else, whether it be a family member, person in the news, or a celebrity.
I would be lying if I didn’t say that one or more of these factors have been a driving force for me my entire life, and even had a hand in the creation of Baztards.com. In a previous blog (Pride (A Deeper Love)… check it out), I had spoken about a need I have had growing up to make my family proud of me. Looking back now, I think something within me knew I was “different,” and knew I would never go into the family business, or get married and have kids like my siblings. So I got good grades, was the first member of my family to attend and graduate college with top honors, and pushed myself to be independent. In the end, I think it caused a lot of unnecessary tension and drama between my mother, siblings and myself.
Hitting 40 was a major turning point for me. I spent the first six months of that year being the “Housewife” or “Arm-candy” to somebody else, and pushing him to follow all his dreams. Make no mistake; I have nobody else to blame but myself for that, and putting myself last. After that relationship went south, and my health came to the forefront, I spent the next six months focusing on myself. I realized I needed to start working on my dreams in life, and healing myself… inside and out.
Part of that healing was a project I had been talking about for years. I have always wanted to create my own website, where people could go and vent about things, and let it go right there and then. The “inspiration” behind it was the burn book from the movie Mean Girls. Unfortunately, the webpage building sites I have seen do not have the technology yet to make an interactive page, without giving the contributors free reign over editing of the entire site. It’s a concept I definitely still believe in, and want to incorporate one day… once these sites catch up to my ideas. But for now, I had to look for another way to help others.
What’s that saying: Be the change? So much like Madonna, I wanted to start a revolution for people who have been pushed down, and help them see that they controlled their own destiny, and were their own force to be reckoned with. And since I couldn’t create a site where people could talk about what’s going on with them, I decided to be the person doing the talking, with the hopes that experiences from my past will help inspire others, and start conversations. And that’s when Baztards.com was born.
From there, conversations did start, articles got published, titles were given, and yes, my family and friends were proud of me. And more importantly, I was proud of me. The rest, as they say, was history…
So now, what’s ahead for Baztards.com?
This past week, I celebrated my 41st birthday, and I decided that this year will be an amazing one. There are so many positive things going on in my life at this moment, from my health, to a new relationship, to new business ventures, and I want to share that with people.
Nothing has given me more pleasure and inspiration these past few months than hearing from people struggling through something and pushing through. We all have a tale to tell, and there's something to be said about exposing yourself and being vulnerable. I hope to one day be able to share other people’s stories of triumph over adversity on Baztards.com, and let their stories inspire others as well. The skies the limit for all of us, and I think it’s time we all start reaching for it.
I once again thank all of you for following me on this journey, and look forward to hearing from all of you in the future.